tick tock....tick tock!

I think my internal clock is changing... seems like just yesterday I could fall asleep before my head hit the pillow at 10:30 or 11 pm. Now, I'm lucky to get to sleep before midnight...and I wake up every night at 2 a.m. or 4 am....why is that? I've also been having very graphic dreams, none of which I can remember after breakfast. I used to always remember my dreams, I think I'm losing it.

But I will say that the once obnoxious phrase of "Just wait till you get older, time goes by faster than you can imagine"...is so true, it's scary.

I remember being in 5th grade, standing in the Wood's elementary playground in a crazed dead stare at Chaffin Junior High thinking 'I will never get there!' (for those of you not from Ft. Smith, Woods Elementary school, grades 1st-6th, was squished right up against the junior high school 'Chaffin' grades 7th-9th, on a huge acreage of land. I always thought it to be strange that they were so close to one another)

Thinking back, time seemed to stand still, especially 5th-6th grade, those years stand out as the most stagnant years of my life. I used to bring Jolly Ranchers to Ms. Douglas's 4th grade class everyday to pass the time (and mostly to rebel cause candy was not allowed). Each day I brought 4 of them. Why 4? Let me explain....well morning recess wasn't until 10:30....so from 8:00 -10:30 a.m. I would try to slip in a jolly rancher. Then after morning recess we had 2 more hours until lunch, which at the time seemed like eternity....so another chance for me to eat another jolly rancher to pass the time, from noon to 2 pm (afternoon recess) another jolly rancher, from 2:30-3:30 the last and final jolly rancher which meant only one thing- school was almost out for the day! This crazy A.D.D. obsession went on until the dreaded Mrs. Avery's class - 7th grade History....she was a freaking psychic! I literally would be attempting to put in the jolly rancher in my mouth and out of nowhere she would 'politely' yell at me to 'spit it out'. (she never was really that mean, she was disgustingly nice, actually) I'm not really sure how she managed to catch me, but I never got away with candy in her classroom. And if you can believe it or not, I never had a cavity until I was 22! Anyways, the point being to my story: Time Flies! Now I get to work, attend morning clinical report, see a few patients... look up and it's noon- 'what the heck'- go back to work, attend a family care conference, see a few more patients...look up- it's 5pm...everyday, the same thing, I'm constantly amazed by the speed of time.

Who would've known that 15 years later I would be begging to add a couple of hours to my day.

ODE to the UNDERDOG!

Ode to OSU, the eternal underdog....

"Ode to the underdog, how bittersweet you are

you frustrate me so, but my feelings are n'ver far

I scream and I cheer all season long

just to be let down when plays go all wrong

all season you allure us, from win to win

but let it be know, Bedlam is no friend

ode to the underdog, my beloved alma mater

my tears will forever roll, like flooding water"

Go Pokes.

Alamo bowl...pish.

For all of you out there who will always love OK.STATE

Forget the kids...the Elderly say the darndest things!

Many of you know that I love my job, I work in long-term care, mostly with the elderly: the hours are great and flexible, I get to go from building to building making each day different and new, it's the great!

AND if you know me really well you know that I want to put every lil' elderly pumpkin in my pocket and take them home. I cannot pass an old man in Walmart without tearing up, especially if they are alone!!! ugh that's the worst! My mom used to have to make up stories so that I could emotionally move on from dwelling on why the little old man in isle 12 was shopping alone. She would say 'Oh Missy, he's got a wife at home cooking away and she was out of sugar', although I always knew she was completely pulling the stories out of the air, somehow I could get back to reality.

Because of this true love I have for the elderly population, it is only fitting to share the most funny moments I have been able to witness while working in long term care.

*As a disclaimer:

MANY of the elderly I work with have dementia or Alzheimer's so I like to think of them as: us, with no social filter. If they think it, it's gonna come out!

**Also the patients names were changed for the stories

Mrs. Jones wheeled up to a CNA the other day and said "I don't know what to do with myself today". The CNA, responded well there's plenty to do; there are recreation activities, we could put on a movie for you, and lunch is coming up soon."

Mrs. Jones responded, "well that all sounds fine, but what I'd really like to do is take a comb to that nasty hair of yours"

hahaha!

Mr. Smith, who is what we like to call very 'pleasantly confused' man just an absolute joy to be around. Recently he went home with his wife for Thanksgiving and stayed the night in his own home rather than returning to the nursing home that night. The morning he returned to the nursing home, he was singing and carrying on with a love song (which he usually does, but he was much more chipper in his tunes). I asked Mr. Smith, "How was your Thanksgiving, did you have fun with your family?" He responded very loudly and animated "It was great, I didn't want to go upstairs to bed, but my wife did and I'm sure glad I did, WOW, VaaaVoooom!" Then he went back to singing.

hahaha!

Jeff came with me to one of my nursing homes for a fall festival recently. Now it's important to know that women make of the majority of the population in most facilities. In saying that, every time Jeff comes to work with me the 'older ladies' act even more kooky and crazy than normal. One patient in particular made quite the scene when Jeff showed up. Asking Jeff to dance with her, and making hilarious inappropriate jokes. After a few minutes the patient pulled out her pills and said "Well, I better take my birth control just in case this goes any further" (she's 92)

hahaha!

My last story actually took place at Methodist Nursing home in Fort Smith , AR where my nana lived for a couple of years. Last Christmas Jeff and I were in visiting my nana as we always did and the nurse came down and said "Santa is here and he's about to make a presentation for all the residents in the activities room you all should go"

So Jeff, myself, & my mom pushed Nana down in her wheelchair to the extremely filled activities room- probably about 60 patients and their families all awaiting Santa to come into the room and sing, etc...

Jeff being the social butterfly that he is, stopped Santa from going in so he could get a picture with Santa and Nana before the big presentation, and spent a couple of minutes talking and joking with 'Santa'.

Since there was no room in the activities room for us, we sorta squished in and stood at the doorway where Santa was going to enter the room, just as they announced to the patients "Here comes Santa"...Jeff grabbed him by the arm in the doorway and in front of everyone yelled "Santa, knock 'em dead"

My jaw hit the floor.

There are soo many more, but they require to much explanation.

Hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving weekend!

With much love!

Nana

This blog is dedicated to one of the most kind, loving, god-fearing woman that I have ever had the privilege to love, Mrs. Mollie 'Jo' Tucker...aka...Nana

I lost her this year, on May 13th to be exact.

I forget she's not here though, isn't that the most terrify feeling....to think nothing of picking up the phone to call someone you miss, just to realize a phone will not reach them, that their voice on this earth is gone. My nana was my voice of reason, my provider of faith when mine was lost, and the reminder that there is in fact a another place other than this, she helped me to believe. Women like this are rare. And my Granddaddy spent his whole married life making sure everyone knew that my nana was a honorable woman of God.

I can still hear her answer the phone now "Well hi shug" ('shug' being southern slang for 'sugar'), she would listen for hours to my troubles and concerns- she could talk me through any situation. It's weird not having grandparents anymore. It's like a reminder that nothing on this earth last forever. As I have struggled with my faith recently, I try and wonder what Nana & Granddaddy would say to my questioning heart. Sometimes I wonder if I mostly believe in heaven because I cannot bear the thought that those I love are 'no more' after death. When I start to think like this, I reallllly miss home. Things I miss about the south: Church, the openness of faith, KLOVE radio, praise and worshiping with friends, bible studies. There is just something very nostalgic about living in an environment that welcomes conversations about faith- now I'm not knocking the Northeast- it is what it is- and somewhere down the road I'll be able to understand the value that it has given us...but for now, i'm struggling with it.

I want to share some old photos of my Nana & Granddaddy- because they are to precious to not share.

While her last 2 years on this earth were not pleasant, selfishly I was just happy that she was still here. The entire staff at Methodist Nursing home in Fort Smith, AR were incredible. They gave her some much dignity and peace her last few years, and I will never forget the efforts of those who cared for her.

It's amazing that the bodies we try so hard to perfect, will indeed fail us eventually.

I hope everyone has at least someone in their life, this special, to remind them of what is important. I can only pray that I can live up to an ounce of the woman my nana was.

Proverbs 31: 10-31- thank you for teaching me these things nana.

13 months later....

It's amazing what a job change will do to you...

Last October (2009) I quit my full time job at Aetna to pursue a full time job with the long term care company I was working with on the side. Since working at 4 nursing homes around the state requires much travel and go-go-go time, and less sitting in front of a computer time, I totally lost touch with my blog. (my apologies) Recently wonderful hubs gave me my first *Apple laptop so I have no excuse to stray away again!

Ooohhh...WHERE TO START?

The 13 months between my last post and today has brought much change. For starters, from Oct 2009-April 2009 Jeff was in pursuit for Grad school and was accepted into Columbia, UT, and UPENN in April of 2010. In May of 2010 Jeff and I decided UPENN was the best option for us (after many long nights of discussion & prayers)

Little did we know this was not the only decision we had to face:

The next few months were spent trying to decide if I should stay in New Haven or if I should go with Jeff to Philly- why you ask...well, the UPENN Architecture grad program is only 9 months long, and Jeff's employer in CT left an open invite to return after school. Being that I loved my job at the time and finally felt like I was making huge strides in my career, moving away was not #1 on my agenda. BUT, I felt like in order to be led by God I had to pursue every option to the fullest until his plan was revealed, so I did. I stayed 'mum' for 3 months at work- have you ever heard the expression "act like a duck: elegant on the surface, and fighting like hell under the water to stay afloat"- this was me. From May-August I let no one in my immediate world in CT know what was going on behind the scenes, for fear of losing my job. I applied for job after job in Philadelphia, not one equal to my current position. I drove down to Philly 1/2 dozen times to interview....oh my gosh the interviews-- they were brutal! I felt like I was living the biggest lie, going to work with a smile, staying up all night filling out applications and searching for anything that could support us in Philly. Meanwhile, we finally found an apartment in June, it was beautiful, new, and way out of our price range- but we splurged. We never splurge, we had lived so minimally for 4 years we just couldn't help ourselves. OH, to have a washer and dryer again-- AND a garbage disposal!!! I was elated! BUT... 3 months of interviewing, negotiating, compromising the jobs I was offered in Philly were never going to be able to support us for a year. We had to make the tough decision for me to stay in CT while Jeff was in school in Philly, so that we could make it.

So... apartment in Philly for Jeff (check), totally out of our price range (check), where the heck is Missy going to live....that was the next hurdle. With the end of July (and our current lease) nearing I was getting nervous. One morning a friend at work (one of the only people who knew my situation) told me of a women that wanted to rent out a room of her beach house and was pet friendly. It was music to my ears, I still remember the feeling I had when I drove up to her home, and met her, and instantly knew...this is actually going to work. Within a few weeks we moved Jeff to Philly, myself to my new rented room on the ocean and I still to this day have no idea how we got so lucky. God is good. It is not easy living away from your husband of almost 4 years. 'Displaced' is not a big enough word to describe it, but we are making it work and have one hell of a story.

Max and I try to visit almost every weekend and when jeff is able he takes the train up to CT to see us. The best part- Jeff is pursuing his dream, I got to keep my wonderful job and I can say that for a short time in my life, I got to live at the beach (which was my dream).

While there is so much more this is where I'll leave it for now... so glad to be back!

Back to life...back to re-a-lity

Hello blog world…long time no posts! Well I’ve had a whirlwind of a week/weekend.
After some long thought and stressful contemplating, last Monday I decided to give my 3 weeks notice at my current full time job. While my full time job has given me an immense amount of experience and responsibility- it’s time to move on.
If you know me, you know that for the last year I have been working 3 different jobs: a full-time job in Hartford and two part time jobs with local long term care facilities (about 70 hours a week) I’ve been working early mornings, late nights, and every weekend. While my job duties are completely different in each, the company who owns the long term care facilities (closer to home) offered me a full time position I just could not turn down.
So…as of October 26th I will no longer have to spend 2 hours a day in a car in terrible, relentless traffic driving to Hartford. Hooray! I will also no longer have to get up before the sun, or work late nights and weekends. HELLO LIFE… I’M BACK! Things that I will welcome back into my life:
-Working out
-Cooking
-Relaxing
-Getting home before 6 pm
-More time with family
-Weekends off
…and the list could go on…
Ultimately, I prayed, God answered, and I couldn’t be more excited.

This past weekend Jeff’s Grandmother and Aunt came up to Connecticut for a long weekend visit. We gave them the ‘Jeff & Missy CT tour’ of which I’ve memorized by heart. They had a wonderful time, and were very appreciative of everything- which is always nice! We went to the winery for a picnic, we picked apples and spent a good amount of time in the pumpkin patch picking out the best 2 ‘green’ pumpkins we could find- not going to lie, I’ve never seen green pumpkins before…but they were surprisingly cute. We took grandma and aunt Elaine to the top of the East Rock cliff, to Jeff’s work, and then to the Coast for a Sunday brunch

Now the view of the Sunday brunch was breath taking…however, the plastic I found buried in my food was also break taking- yet in a more ‘Oh my gosh, why is there plastic in my food’ kind-of way. Compliments to the Chef for the long thin piece of plastic he felt would add to my nourishment. I will say the waiter was very attentive and offered me another meal…but I’m just not the kind of person who can keep eating once I find non food objects in my food. (restaurant not given, because they are respectable and handled the situation appropriately)

We woke up this morning to a crisp 38 degrees…yuk yuk yuk!
Now, I know from all the facebook updates that it’s chilly down in the south this week, but for all of you who are cold in Oklahoma/Arkansas, you know that next week it will be 80 degrees down there. However, as for the Northeast- our fall/Autumn is here, and there will be no more warming up until May. Boo hiss.
In honor of the chill in the air, I will give out my ‘Spiced Cookie’ Hot Cocoa Recipe!

Spiced Cookie

1 package of Hot Cocoa (I prefer Dark Chocolate Sensation by Swiss Miss)
6 oz Hot water
½ shot Kahlua
¼ shot Peppermint Schnapps

Heat water, stir in packet of cocoa, add alcohol...be happy.

Grapes, Apples & Mohegan Sun

What a wonderful weekend we had! Saturday morning our friends Toby & Amy came up from NYC to hang out for the weekend. We started off the day with a trip to Gouveia Vineyard in Wallingford, Connecticut for some wine tasting and scenic views. For only $5 a person we got to try 6 different wines, and keep the wine glass! The views were beautiful and the weather was perfect (just enough fall chill in the air).

Toby, Amy, me, Jeff

We then drove up the road to Lyman’s Orchard to pick Toby up some ‘Apple Cider Donuts’, the line was long but it was well worth the wait! From there we drove back to New Haven’s East Rock, where you can see the entire city of New Haven and in the distance Long Island.

The wine was beginning to wear off so we just did a ‘drive-thru’ tour of Yale/New Haven downtown.
After about an hour of decompressing we took Amy & Toby to Barcelona, a Spanish Tapas’ restaurant, which was fabulous! After some Blood Orange Margaritas & Old Fashions’ we were ready for some couch time and a movie. Jeff & Toby decided on the movie “I love you Man!”, and after about 45 minutes Amy and I both crashed. So I guess the movie was okay (?)

We woke up Sunday morning and drove out to Mohegan Sun casino. Unfortunately, we were all on a losing streak, except Amy who won $6 on a Black Jack machine, haha.
But we did enjoy the staff of Johnny Rockets Burgers who sang ‘Respect’ to us while we chowed down on our greasy burgers. After some Ben & Jerry’s a few ‘free’ drinks (which actually were not free since we definitely lost more than the cost of the drinks) we decided to call it a day and drove back to New Haven. Amy & Toby packed up and made their hike back to NYC. We were sad to see them go, but great weekends like this make it much easier to be in the Northeast so far away from our family.

Rice Cakes, green bruises, blury photos

As I promised, I am continuing the 'photo op', 'post op'. Tomorrow will be 2 weeks post surgery and I'm starting to feel back to normal, well at least 80%. I'm able to use some makeup to cover most of the blob-like bruises that remain greenish yellow under my eyes and on my cheeks and dark eye shadow is all I need to cover my purple eye lids. The only catch, I still can't smile. My mouth/mainly upper lip is completely numb and somewhat 'stuck'. I look like a total Emo . I'm trying to avoid all funny conversations for fear that I might expose my incredibly awkward half moon grin-- and have resorted to asking boring questions like 'oh, I heard your son got braces, how is he deal with that'. My nosey cubical neighbor who spends most of her morning, gnarling on weight watchers rice cakes, continues to be...well super nosey. I'm sure we've all experienced the nosey cubical neighbor, but this one has got to be on the top ten worst list. The minute I returned to work yesterday, she made a bee-line to my cube-ie, and threw out some excuse to ask about my battered face, 'oh, you've been out for awhile, and you look puffy, are you suffering from a cold'. NO, I wanted to yell then lie and say I got in a really great bar fight just to watch her dramatic reaction- but I saved the energy and just told her that I had sinus surgery. She of course, proceeded to tell me that she, too, has had sinus surgery and made me re-live the nauseam of the entire event. What are the odds.

If I haven't addressed my nosey neighbor yet in my blog, I'm not sure why. She has continued to surprise me almost daily with questions like "Oh, I overheard you say you're parents were in Jamicia" or "So sorry to hear that you have IBS, do you take anything for that?" ....REALLY LADY? I can no longer take any personal phone call from my desk phone, for fear of her bat-like ears listening in on my entire conversations. The worst part is she's a snitch, and always has that weird look of enjoyment on her face as she watches me squirm as I answer her insane questions. But for today, enough about Rice Cake lady-

Here's the pictures, my mouth/upperlip & nose are still swollen: (by the way I'm starting to feel weird taking pictures of myself, and this may be the last photo op until I am completely healed and someone else will agree joining me in a photo)

We've got some pretty awesome plans for the upcoming weekend. Our friends Amy & Toby are driving in from NYC to spend the weekend in CT with us. Agenda: Apple Picking, the fair, Italian food, Wineries, and Mohegan Sun Casino. It's gonna be a good time! And hopefully pictures from the weekend to come!





I hope everyone who stops by my bloggity blog has a fabulous week.
Objective this month- to avoid the Swine Flu, we'll see how that goes!

5 Senses

WAAWHOOO The packing is OUT! I went to visit my surgeon yesterday to get my packing out and while it was the single most painful experience of my life- I CAN BREATHE PEOPLE!!!! I had no idea what it felt like to have 100% airflow in my nose! It's amazing! My first breath felt like the air went in my nose and straight out the back of my head!

Now, for the gross part- I mean I knew there would be a ton of packing in my nose- but in my mind it was sorta like a 'tampon' up my nose-that would just be pulled out- man was I wrong! My doctor started to pull out the packing and I let out a shrill that was beyond human, and I literally could not stop yelling.

One Word. PAINFUL!!!!!!

My doctor kept saying in a thick accent "Why are you screaming" (which actually sounded like "vveye are yew shcreeming".....My mom and Jeff cannot stop laughing about this now) but I just wanted to slap him and say 'I'm sorry but you're ripping crap out of my head!

Tyler Sowers put it best "it feels like your being pulled inside out by your nose". I mean the doctor just kept pulling and pulling and the packing kept coming! 4 FEET!!!! Yes my mom and Jeff verify that there was at least 4 feet of gauze pulled out of my nostrils, I'm glad I have witnesses because I don't think anyone would believe me.

Apparently, I had so many polyps that they went as far up as my forehead and under my eyes-which is why I had to get packing in the first place. So I'll give you 3 guesses where that packing was shoved! With every tug, I could tell you exactly which socket and bone the packing was touching- SICK.

Okay enough gross stuff. I feel great and I could not be more excited for whats to come.

I did have to get re-taped and still look like a victim of a bar fight but each day the swelling gets better and better.

My upper lip is still numb and my smile looks like a 8 year old's dorky yearbook picture, and it's making for great home videos. I'm sorta convinced Jeff is video taping me in the process to use as black mail later!

I also still cannot smell or taste anything. And from this, I think I'm on to something. It's a great diet plan. I have no cravings for food. I cannot taste ANYTHING so eating just doesn't sound fun. And actually, salty foods burn my tongue and throat (hoping this is normal ???).

I'll have to look into developing a pill that takes away 2 of your senses for weight loss- ha

Well here's a picture from yesterday right after I got the packing out. (The tinting on my face makes me laugh, I am now a nice shade of mustard yellow.)

I also dropped my wonderful mother off at the airport this morning. It was awful. She's really done an amazing job keeping me busy and positive these last 7 days. The minute we got home from the airport it started raining and has been sorta lonely and depressing without her, but I'm sooo happy for the time I got with her! Nothing like having a mom who is a nurse around. My hubby Jeff has also been wonderful! Although, I got really worried and googled for almost an hour to see if laughing too hard will make my nose break again after surgery! He's almost impossible to be around and not laugh. All and all, this experience has not been too bad. And I'm just so glad I can now get on with the rest of my life :)

Red, Purple & Blue!

WARNING- If you have a sensitive stomach or get grossed out easily you may not want to read the rest of this blog post

I went in for my nose surgery on Thursday Sept 10th at 11 a.m. Although I was very nervous, my next door neighbor is in CRNA school (nurse anesthetist) at the Hospital in the outpatient surgery dept. She was so sweet and set me up with a really good anesthesiologist and CRNA for my surgery. The nurses the doctors and all of the outpatient staff at St. Raphael’s were so unbelievably amazing and really did everything they could to make me feel comfortable.
The surgery went really well- my surgeon, Dr. Henley, told my mom & Jeff that he had to spent a lot of time ‘cleaning’ up my sinuses; that there were a lot of polyps, cysts and diseased sinus tissue in my nasal cavity. He said he then broke my nose back into place and straightened my septum. gross I know.
I actually woke up from surgery with very little pain. I felt a bit queasy but never actually got sick. We got home, got situated and went through tons of frozen corn bags throughout the next few days to try to keep the swelling down in my face. Because I had an ‘open’ nose surgery and since he had to break it, I knew I was going to be more swollen than most people post-op.
Below are the pictures from the last few days.

Just a sidebar note- yes my matted hair is quiet lovely- no need to be jealous, you too can accomplish this look by not washing your hair for 3 days and having frozen corn melt onto your face- (I seriously don’t know if I’ll ever be able to eat corn again)
The pictures are also very bloody because the doctor had to pack my nose and left me without a ‘mustache drip pad’ –most people get a drip pad which they can change every few hours. But my doctor decided to make a cast, similar to the casts people get when they break there arm. He also used a lot of tape under my nose, so blood just dripped onto my face and got everywhere-Gross.

Surgery Day:

Day 1: (24 hours post op)















Day 2: (48 hours post op)





















Day 3: (72 hours post op....Today)

I can say that the last few days I did get really panicky, not only because I can only breathe out of my mouth, but I also feel like the swelling just keeps getting worse and I’m afraid my face will never be the same. I’m trying really hard to not let how I look now freak me out.
If I could put into words what it feels like I would say- it feels like the worst sinus infection you could imagine. There is soo much negative pressure in my sinus that ever time I swallow my ears plug up for almost an hour. So there really is no sharp pain involved- just a very frustrating amount of pressure. I get my packing out on Tuesday and have been told there will be immediate relief with that. My mom and Jeff have been such troopers. I seriously could not have gone through this without them. There’s just a feeling of serenity about having your mom near when you go through something like this.
For now I’m praying for comfort on Tuesday when my doctor will have to pull out the packing- and praying that I can withhold from sneezing for now! haha
I will continue to update with pictures.

Goodbye Boob Tube!

After 4 weeks of waiting, the TV that we've been dying to purchase finally went on sale- I mean really went on sale- so we had to get it! And I've always told Jeff, if we're going to get a new TV, we might as well get the biggest we can afford-because we don't plan on living in a tiny apartment our whole lives. So today, we got a Samsung 55" flat screen TV and she's a beauty. The best part about it- it is being delivered Sunday morning and will be set up in time for the Dallas Cowboys kick off against Tampa Bay. This will also come in handy when watching our OSU Cowboys take us to a BCS Bowl this year- Yes, I'm going to make that prediction now!

Our labor day weekend has been great- it just flew by wayyy to fast! I woke up this morning thinking to myself, 'it's just so great to have a 3 day weekend, so much time..blah blah blah'. Then it hit me- it's already MONDAY! HOLY CRAP where did the 3 day weekend go!?

Friday night we didn't do much, just made some drinks and sat out on the porch enjoying the weather. Saturday we spent the morning at the beach, and in the afternoon we joined our New Haven-OSU group to watch OSU defeat Georgia! Woowhoo! On Sunday we got up early and drove to Cape Cod to celebrate Adam & Anna's wedding at Camp Carson. What a wonderful day it was, tons of drinks, food and friends all around a lake in the middle of the Cape! We drove home late last night, and Jeff got up at 5 am to go play 18 holes of golf while I slept - I have no idea how he had the energy cause I was pooped. Today, I worked awhile at the Nursing home and we've been cleaning house, getting ready for my mom to come stay with us- sooo excited!

That's all for now...getting ready for Thursday- part of me is terrified, the other part is super excited and ready to get it over with!

I smell change...

Well my friends, I’m taking the plunge. After 14 years of frustration, I have decided to get my nose all prettied up & fixed.
About 9 months ago I started noticing an increase in trouble breathing, especially at night, and overall soreness in my nose. Over the past few years the skin on the bridge of my nose has started to feel paper thin and after months and months of contemplation I finally decided to visit an ENT (Ear, Nose, and Throat) doctor for an evaluation. I was very nervous and made Jeff go with me. Before the evaluation started the doctor said "Your nose is crooked and your face isn’t symmetrical, have you ever had any trauma involving your nose?" (nice guy eh?) I let the doctor know that I have broken my nose twice, but besides having very frequent sinus infections my entire life that is all that I can regard as a possible cause for the pain and trouble breathing.
The doctor-- who was wearing an old school doctor's headband with a light bulb on it, that blinded me every time he looked towards me-- stuck a cold metal cone up my nostril and said “hum…oh…humm” –(note to anyone in med school or aspiring to be a doctor- don’t do this- it scares people, gesh) He then informed me that not only is my septum completely sideways in my nose, but I also have large 'polyp-like' cysts up in my sinus and he needs to send me over to the hospital to get a CAT scan, to get a better look at the polyps. Awesome- at this point I wanted to run away- luckily Jeff was there to make me laugh and keep me calm. So the next day Jeff & I went to the Radiology dept at St. Raphael Hospital to get my CAT scan. The radiologist tech was super nice and let me know that I did indeed have a nice sized brain in there- (thank God, cause I was worried, ha). After about a week we went back to the ENT doctor and he let me know in super medical lingo that I indeed had large polyps that were blocking my airways and they had to come out- and he will have to re-build the sinus walls because they are diseased. Again, awesome, I have diseased sinus walls, sounds healthy.

On a positive note, two good things came from this news-
1. I get to have my surgery covered almost in full by insurance

2. I feel more at ease about doing the surgery, since I now know that if I don’t do it, there is chance that these polyps will get so big that I will no longer be able to breathe out of my nose-which is pretty important, right?

My third visit with my ENT doctor was the best, because I got to do a photo opt- and get a virtual simulation on what my new nose will look like. At first he made the ‘new nose’ look like a lil’ pug nose-which I DO NOT WANT. I also told him that I would like to not end up with a ski slope either! I must say now, that cosmetically speaking the appearance of my nose has always bothered me, but it was never enough to get me to fix it. I had the occasional tease from stupid boys in school- but I always told myself it’s what God gave me, and I would move on. So I had to let the doctor know that I want to look like me. I don’t want to come out of this looking like MJ, I really just want a mini-version of what I have now. So…here it is folks- the man who has met me 3 times has decided what I will look like (weird concept)

What do you think? At first I was like WHOA, way too small...then I realized that my 'large/small' ratio scale is off since I have always had a mile long snout. I took the picture home and stared at it for almost 4 hours- My #1 concern was what Jeff and my parents thought. Jeff loved it- but I think I could end up with one eye and Jeff would love me just the same. My mom said it looks like it did when I was little, before I broke it- and she got a bit teary because she is really the only person in this world that knows the heart ache that came from the teasing in school from other kids.

I know some may think it’s weird that I’m being so open about this- but frankly I really don’t care what people think. I just want to be open and honest with myself, my friends and family-thus the reason for the posting.
My surgery is next week- Thursday Sept 10th- and my wonderful mom is coming up to help Jeff take care of me. I’m so blessed to have such a supportive husband, family & friends and I love you all.
I will definitely be posting updates & pictures over the next few days on this bloggity blog, so stay tuned! Looking forward to breathing normal again!

I'm 26, and I now have a lisp

YuK, YUK, yUk!!! You know how cars have the ‘new car smell’ well my lovely new retainer has the ‘new retainer taste’; a pungent combination of plastic, metal, and cleaning solution, gag me. After a three week wait, I was actually happy to hear this morning that my new retainer was in! I drove to see my Orthodontist and he snapped the thing in place and said- “keep it in, and try not to talk”, sensitive guy, eh? I asked my million questions since he left me dumbfounded with such little instruction. Questions like- do I need to take it out to eat, do I need to have it in at all times, do I need to clean it with a certain solution- I mean, since when does the patient have to interview the doctor for info?
After I got my answers he said come back in 4 weeks and we’ll adjust it. I was like “What?” this is going to be a step by step process!? I thought this was a one & done thing- nope…I’m sure he’s going to drag me along until he feels I have paid enough (again) for straight teeth. Whatever, I’m vein and I want my teeth to be straight again- so I’ll put up with the thing.
This past weekend was of course a whirlwind- when is it not? Friday I went shopping with a friend of mine Kelsey- who is super fun and is a great shopping buddy! Friday night Jeff & I ordered out sushi-and to my surprise Jeff also got me a Quart (yes quart) of my favorite Ginger Dressing from our sushi place so I could make my ginger salads at home- it took all I had not to open the quart container and just drink the stuff- it’s pretty fantastic!
Saturday we sleep in late then found ourselves at Panera, which has become our Saturday morning ritual. Jeff decided to start calling it ‘Panera Carb Load Company’ because as you know Panera will give you the biggest carb load crash in the world “Hi would you like carbs, carbs or more carbs with your bread bowl of soup.”
Saturday night we hung out a Kelsey’s and Ben’s house with another couple, Bob & Lauren and had some fabulous burgers and played taboo until us girls beat the boys so bad that they found every excuse in the book to stop playing
On Sunday, I don’t know what came over me but I just had to clean, and clean I did- 8 trash bags later the guest bedroom & kitchen were organized, clean, and clutter free! It’s weird because I consider myself a pretty neat and tidy person; however, I’m a drawer stasher of late. If something didn’t have a ‘home’ it’s new home was a drawer- where I didn’t have to see it- after 3 years you could say my drawers and cabinets belonged in a home of a hoarder. So something had to be done-
Speaking of Hoarder- has anyone else been watching that show on A&E? I think I’ll credit that show for my sudden desire to clean up my hidden piles.
Well I guess I will go officially start working today- since it’s almost noon, and my morning has consisted of facebooking, reading our local online paper, and blogging.
Back to the grind!

BOOKS BOOKS & more BOOKS

Oh my gosh, I love to read. Who knew?

Well, what can I say, I was a typical kid and used good ol' handy dandy 'Cliff Notes' growing up for all occasions. My teachers, did of course, frown upon this but what's a girls to do- I needed time to talk on the phone, play sports, and write an endless amount of notes to my friends-of which contained nothing because you're always afraid a note will be stolen-
My life was busy, so like many of ya'll did, I spent the $5.95 on Cliff Notes from Books-A-Million, for someone else to tell me what the heck Shakespeare was talking about.
What freakin' lame-o I was! Yes, I managed to get good grades (somehow)- but here I am, approaching my 26 b-day and I haven't read even ONE of the many classic novels!... -I'm sure my best friend Lindsay (a.k.a. A 7th grade english teachers) is saying 'oh my gosh, missy...,that's terrible' , and I deserve it ;)

So here's my new gig. I'm going to press the rewind button and allow myself a second chance to catch up to all those smarty pants out there who actually took the time to read the books we were assigned in school...except this time, I get to pick the book list.

1. Angela's Ashes, by Frank McCourt, 1996
2. 'Tis, by Frank McCourt, 1999
3. The Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger, 1951
4. The Grapes of Wrath, by John Steinbeck, 1939
5. To Kill a Mockingbird, by Harper Lee, 1960
6. 1984, by George Orwell, 1949
7. Animal Farm, by George Orwell, 1945
8. Catch 22, by Joseph Heller, 1961
9. Lord of the Flies, by William Golding, 1954
10. Slaughter House Five, by Kurt Vonnegut,1969
11. One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, by Ken Kesey, 1962
12. Gulliver's Travels, by Johnathan Smith, 1726
13. The Color Purple, Alice Walker, 1982

So I started Angela's Ashes yesterday, and it's zooming by. Such a great story. I find myself feeling as if I'm there in Ireland watching this family go through so much in the 1930's. I found it hard to tear myself away from the pages...but after neglecting to spend anytime with Jeff & Max yesterday I put the book down and watched some tube (tv) with Jeff. But let me tell you- within 5 minutes I was out, cold, snoozing.

I'd love to hear any advice on good classics to add to my book list, that anyone may have. I do have a long winter coming up, so I need to get my library stocked asap!
Book list topic to be continued...we'll see how long this lasts ;)

CONSTRUCTION!!!

Hello everyone in blog world!

I am currently working with Jennifer McKinney from 'Jen gets fancy' to put a lil bling-in-the-blog.
Since I'm new at this I will probably hold off posting anything until she's done.

Hopefully in a week or so I will be able to debut my new blingin' bloggity blog.
Stay tuned....

Smack & Cheese

July 13th
"First Blog Jitters"

So after a few years of trying to keep up with friends and family via Facebook, texting, and phone dates I decided to jump in head first into a bloggity blog.

While we've been blessed with opportunities that brought us to the great state of Connecticut, Jeff and I both feel like we have left a huge piece of our lives back home, so a blog is in order.

First things first: The Title-
I think I will break it down like this, most of my blogs will probably start with the 'smack' or the lastest happenings, events, or stories in our world, and then will come the cheese, the goo that tops off the smack-usually will be some sentimental moment when I realize why things are the way they are or simply pictures to describe the smack.
So ladies & gentlemen, let the smack and cheese begin...